A Penny from Grandma

A Penny From Grandma

I am like a penny, a very bright one.

Remember, my darling children,

I'll always turn up.

Whenver you find a penny anywhere

in the years to come,

you pick it up and say,

"There's Grandma!"

Here's a penny, take it.

It is the first of many.

In time you will have a thousand reminders

That I'm telling you how much

You are loved.

         (written by my cousin, Stephanie)

I find shiny pennies a lot.  Sometimes when I'm least expecting one, sometimes when I need it the most.  Last night Grandma wanted to make sure she knew she was with me.  This entry is one of those times when I am going to look back and be so thankful (oh!  I am thankful for shiny pennies!)  I wrote about this moment.  Three years ago, I lost my grandparents and mother-in-law in 6 weeks of each other.  It was the most trying time of our lives, we have never felt so much emptiness or loss.  The upcoming holidays are the hardest for me because Sandy turned her house into a Winter Wonderland and she made everything magical for the children.  Throughout this week, we have slowly pulled out some boxes and with Cork, my father-in-law moving into his first new place in 33 years, he has given me some special things of Sandy's.  Having some of her things in our house touches me very deeply, but it is also very painful to see and remember.  We also came across our box of snow globes which my grandparents were giving us each Christmas.  I am so thankful for the memories, but it's also times like this when it's hard to face reality without them. 

That's why Grandma leaves pennies (shiny pennies) for us to find.  Last night I decided I needed a bath to unwind, but something made me reach for the journal I worte in during the time when we were going through our losses.  It was so hard to read, but so good for me to smile and remember so many little things I had forgotten about during those very sad days. 

Later I had asked Emily to pull the towels out of the dryer.  She called me in and said, "Look at that shiny penny, Mom!"  It's so bright and it's right on top of the towels!  That is so weird!  It was just right there when I went to pick up the basket!"  I looked at the pureness of the towels with the shiny penny laying on them, and then I looked at Emily.  I knew Grandma was telling me to keep my head up and focus on my girls, and life was going to be hard sometimes, but just keep looking for those bright, shiny pennies. 

Thanks, Grandma.  I needed that one, especially.